What Does CONNOR Want?

Some will say what I want is impossible, but I don’t believe it. With all this nano-techno an’ genetic-engineering and quarktransmogrifying research going on, I think it’s simply a matter of (a) recognizing what I want is of paramount importance, and (b) gettin’ busy grappling genes, souping up subatomic stuff, and nattering with nano-bits or whatever the heck the inventor-geeks do.

I want Quad muffs with a “Braying Jackass Suppression” setting, okay? Besides dampening the decibel levels of gunshots, you should be able to isolate an’ identify the audio frequencies generated by Jack Cass-type jackasses, and muffle those too. Hey, Bob Walker! I know you can do it, buddy! Get with it!