Beating Apocalyptic Assumptions & Mayhem


The past two-plus weeks we’ve been bombarded, befuddled and bamboozled with the latest “End of the World” scenario. The culprit? Mass hysteria caused by the media. More powerful than any “assault rifle,” their weapon of choice is fear. This man-made enemy can’t be seen with the naked eye yet looms large in the minds of many. It seemingly packs a punch capable of wiping all of mankind off the face of the earth.

Panic & Fear

We’re told this Coronavirus is more contagious than the regular flu, yet 50- to 80-percent of people infected will be asymptomatic, meaning they won’t show any symptoms, or even know they’ve been infected in the first place. This skews any statistical data of how deadly it is as we have no idea just how large the pool of infected really is.

Meanwhile, large box stores are being hit the hardest — but not by the virus itself, rather an invasion of panic-stricken, surgical-masked wearing sheep, having locust- like appetites for toilet paper, hand soap and bottled water. Descending down the aisles at Mach I speed, their grocery carts wheels wobbling and squeaking, they plunge headfirst into the paper and cleaning products sections.

Single-ply, double-ply, “Fresh Breeze”-scented or “Soothing Aloe Vera,” it doesn’t matter. They need toilet paper and soap, and they need it now!

Every chance the News gets, updates are given of the growing number of people infected with this wicked virus. Some scoff, some shrivel-up, but somewhere in between lies the truth.


Schools and colleges are shut down, professional and collegiate sporting events are cancelled, and some large businesses are closing down in an effort to avoid more contamination of an unknown, no-name bug with a name associated with the beach and bad commercials.

As the world slows to a halt, these closings and cancellations will provide us with something positive — you just need to realize it and take advantage of this blessing in disguise.

Get Outside

While schools are closed and your work suspended, take advantage of the situation and take your kids outdoors. With the weather warming up, it’s the perfect time to soak up some of that Vitamin D!

Make homemade sandwiches, pack some cold drinks and dust off the ole fishing rods. Show your kids where you used to fish as a kid. Stop at the local market and buy some worms, and while you’re at it, introduce them to the fine cuisine gas stations have to offer — namely rotisserie hotdogs, chips and candy. Dunk a few worms and make the world stand still, on your terms.

If you’re fortunate enough to catch a meal-worthy trout, bass or crappie, take a moment to show your kids where real food comes from. Clean it and cook it for dinner. They’ll be amazed that real fish doesn’t come in the form of breaded sticks from a box in the freezer.

Go Shooting

Maybe you’ll just want to load the .22 pistols in the car, grab a few boxes of shells from the safe and head to the range or local dirt mound. Now’s the perfect time to do some bonding over the sweet sounds and smells of plinking.

Or teach your kids the necessity of varmint hunting. They’ll hone their stalking and shooting skills by hunting pesky groundhogs, prairie dogs and other nuisance creatures, which keep local farmers happy. Who knows, you may just get invited back to deer hunt this fall!

And if you can’t make it to the range or field, cover gun safety at home. Teach your kids the rules of gun handling and show them how to properly handle firearms, as well as how to properly clean them.

Positive Attitude

Regardless of how you spend your time, make the most of a contrived situation and show your kids how easy it is to turn an unfortunate situation into one of great memories and moments. Teaching them this life lesson is vital to living and enjoying a wonderful life.

A lion doesn’t worry what the sheep think. And as Franklin Roosevelt stated in 1933, “We have nothing to fear, but fear itself.”

Epidemic Epilogue

I think I’m going to load up Cooper and Maisie in Old Green, my ‘98 Tahoe, and go for a little drive. I’ll stop at one of my favorite mom-and-pop stores and get a hotdog with sauerkraut. Or, maybe I’ll get a half-smoke with hot chili sauce?

Along the way we’ll look for turkeys, see if the bucks have dropped their “horns” yet and enjoy the drive. I suggest you do the same.

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